Got Challenges? That’s Great!

 In America

When faced with adversity in lives how often do we think to ourselves “Yay! This is great!”? Or do we tend to argue with reality: “this shouldn’t be happening…my life shouldn’t have turned out this way…this isn’t right”. We may also have thoughts that tell us we can’t handle this…”we’re so tired, this is too much work. Why is my so life hard?”

That’s been me. But because I’m dedicated to growing as a human being and advancing into a higher level of emotional functioning, I had to take a look at this behavior and ask “how does this really serve me?” And the answer clearly was: It doesn’t. Self-pity takes us on a downward spiral that leads nowhere. It fosters a victim mentality that is dis-empowering and false. I use to spend so much time calling friends who would validate my tale of woe about my “clueless jerk” ex-husband. But, I began to notice how this venting process really didn’t help me; it just kept me mired in my misery.

So, one day I chose to ask myself: how can I use this situation to grow and develop? 

And just that little change in question shifted everything. When I decided to take a radical perspective and view hard challenges, painful situations and even stormy emotions as a great opportunity, I handled them so much better. Why? Because when we decide to welcome and embrace hard times we immediately fill our brain with supportive and productive thoughts that develop the resilience to handle situations with grace. Better yet, these “intentional” thought patterns will serve us in every area of our lives. 

By choosing to see emotional difficulties as opportunities it removes you from the drama…and guess what? There’s no drama when you decide to not see drama. You gain perspective. Try telling yourself “This is exactly what is supposed to be happening my life” the next time you argue with your ex, or he does something you think is hurtful or mean.
You will be a victor and not a victim. And you will be building resilience that will enable you to go out conquer any other area of your that feels “difficult”. You are now mastering the co-parenting journey!

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